Starting Point: It’s just a jump to the left…

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I’ve created a time machine.

Yes, I know, it’s impossible, requires infinite energy, blah, blah, blah. If you’re saying that, then you have not been keeping up with the research. Not only is time travel possible, it is inevitable! There are some caveats: You can’t go back farther than when you turned on the machine, it requires twisting space/time and compressing it over a period, and the channel to the future and present is a millimeter in diameter. So all you can send is information, not people or things. And once you send information from one point in time to another, that “channel” and those points are unreachable. The channel becomes confused and you can’t reuse it. So, there you go, no paradox!

Ha.

Ha ha.

Bwahahahahaha!

Sorry, I now know that the latter is not true. Oh God, how I know that now.

I was working on my thesis project, replicating the research made by Dr. Ron Mallet. He proposed that you could use a laser to “frame drag” space/time and create a closed time-like loop. So far his experiments have come to naught. I think. If he found what I’ve found, then I expect that he’s hiding his results as well. He’s trying to create a “time tunnel”, a tube of circulating laser beams, dragging space/time and forming a time-loop. I couldn’t replicate some of his early results, but then I realized that he was making a series of rings, not a spiral. Also his tube is 2 centimeters across. That’s too wide.

I created a cylinder 20 cm long, 1 mm in diameter and lined it with carefully aligned laser mirrors. The laser beam enters it and travels in a tight spiral down the tube. It took months to get the tiny mirrors aligned in the correct angles for form the exact spiral needed. But a month ago, I succeeded. I formed a closed time-like loop!

I used another laser to┬áreceive and┬ásend messages down the tube. Every other time I’ve turned it on, nothing. But this last time… I turned it on and then I heard my voice come out of the speaker.

“Jackie, it’s me.” I said to myself. “I’m an hour in the future and I wanted you know that it worked. Hopefully I’m saying everything I heard myself say, including this. Anyway, we did it! Wait until I tell Professor Partridge.”

“That’s great,” I replied. “So, what’s it like in the future?”

“Beautiful! We have flying cars, jetpacks and food pills! Ha ha ha ha!” I-her, we laughed. Then I heard the door to the lab open.

“Ah, Miss Santiago,” I heard Professor Partridge say, “how goes your, he-he, ‘time machine’?”

“It works! I’m talking to myself in the past!”

Absolute silence followed that statement. Then screams and the sound of things breaking.

“No! No! It’s impossible for you to create such a thing! A mere woman!”

Then I heard myself croak out, “Jackie! Turn it off! Stop him! Stop him!”

So I shut off the machine. I shouldn’t have been able to do that, but I did. I was no longer connected to that future. It’s been interesting ever since…

So, what’s Jackie been up to? Why did Professor Partridge go off the deep end? Is it more than simple misogyny? And what of Dr. Mallet and his time machine? And what did she mean when she said “that future?” Are we talking an alternate world or as Yoda would say, “In flux the future is”?

mallettBy the way, Dr. Ronald Mallet is a real physicist working on a time machine similar to the one described in the story. Time machines have come into vogue as of late, though whether they would immediately collapse thanks to Hawking radiation or create paradoxes is still up for grabs.


Written by John Reiher

  • Leonardo Faria

    When I come across meditative statements like “blah, blah, blah” and “Bwahahahahaha!” from one who’s allegedly invented a time travel device I can’t help think guy (or gal) is a bit of a braggart and an Internet fake.

    • John H Reiher Jr

      Or someone who has had to explain what they’ve been doing over and over and over… Blah, blah, blah…

      Time travel does that to you.

  • here’s a thought, if there is an infinite amount of universes, you could easily take an infinite amount of energy from the infinite uninhabited universes, thus making time travel possible AND THEY CALLED ME MAD!!! MAD!!! THEY’LL SEE THEY’LL SEE!!!! cough, sorry, I have a bad case of Frankenstein syndrome.

  • I reckon there’s some kind of parallel universe shizzle going on here. The future she’s connected to is actually the future of a universe in which all men are chauvinist pricks.

    • John H Reiher Jr

      What I think is that she didn’t connect to THE Future, but to A Future. And the longer she stays connect to A Future, the more likely it will become THE Future.

      As for Professor Partridge motivations, there are still some old guard in the physics community, who think women get a PhD. just so they can later get a MRS.

      Or… Perhaps Partridge is building his _own_ time machine…

    • so some sort of Australian conservative party universe?